7 Life Lessons I Learned From Arnold Schwarzenegger

For ten years, prior to my career as a speaker and life coach, I worked in the fitness industry as an aerobics instructor, personal trainer and program director at several gyms around Boston. Back then, long before his fall from grace, Arnold Schwarzenegger was one of my heroes, and not just for the obvious reason of physical fitness, but for his determination to go all out to achieve his dreams, all the while staying true to himself.

After reaching the pinnacle of his body building career, having won several Mr. Universe competitions, he switched gears and decided to become an actor, despite the odds stacked against him. One of his first acting coaches told him that he had an accent so thick that he’d need elocution lessons to get rid of it, otherwise no one would understand a word he was saying, and that he had a last name that no one could even pronounce and if he kept it, he’d never be cast in a leading role.

In his very first film, Hercules in New York, Arnold played the lead, but they dubbed over with another actor’s voice and billed him as Arnold Strong. After that, Arnold ditched the elocution lessons, wanting people to say, here comes Arnold when he came around the corner.

I was so inspired by his authenticity and belief in himself because it was something I lacked and desperately wanted. As if I couldn’t admire him any more, in January of 1990 he was appointed Chairman of the President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports under the first Bush Administration.

I could hardly contain my excitement, so I wrote him a congratulatory letter and sent it off to the White House, unsure if he’d ever read it or even receive it, but just the act of doing it gave me the courage to try more new things. I signed up for Toastmasters and joined a community theatre group, not knowing at the time that I was preparing myself for a career in public speaking.

Then, about six months later, after a typical day of schlepping the kids to the gym, teaching an aerobics class, getting my oldest son off to kindergarten and then finally putting the baby down for that long awaited afternoon nap, I poured myself a cup of tea and then went to get the afternoon mail. Amidst a stack of bills and junk mail, I saw it — a large white envelope with the Presidential Seal in the upper lefthand corner.

My heart was pounding and my hands shook as I carefully opened the envelope. The first thing I pulled out was an autographed photo of Arnold that read, To Kathleen, Best Wishes, Arnold Schwarzenegger.

But there was more. Inside the envelope was a personalized letter on Presidential stationary, that, to this day, I can recite those words by heart:

Dear Kathleen,

My apologies for the delay in responding to your very nice letter. I am honored by your praise and even more deeply honored to have been chosen as Chairman of the President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports.

You are important to our work with the schools and families. I hope you never lose the excitement for teaching that is so obvious in your letter.

Sincerely,

Arnold Schwarzenegger

So you might be thinking, oh big deal, that was over thirty years ago. But to me, it symbolized my own life-changing decision to go for it and get off the sidelines of life. For some reason, I’ve shared this story twice this past week, once to a teen client who was struggling with procrastination and then to a friend who was feeling overwhelmed with all the tasks on her to-do list, both feeling like they didn’t have enough time to get everything done. It got me thinking about the all the lessons I could attribute to this experience, so I decided to share them with you too.

1. Stop saying, I don’t have enough time: Time is the great equalizer in that all of us only get 24 hours a day and we have to make time for and prioritize the important things in life. Arnold will probably never know how much his letter meant to me. But the way I see it, if a world-class champion bodybuilder, action hero movie star, and chairman of a national youth outreach organization could find the time to write a response to my heartfelt letter of praise, then what’s my excuse?
2. Believe in yourself and your dreams: Arnold once said, “Anything the mind can conceive, you can achieve, as long as you believe 100%.” You were created for a unique purpose that only you can fulfill. The most successful people in the world are those who dared believe in themselves and their dreams. Your dreams are gifts from God and are not meant to be squandered. This is a biblical truth: Neglect not the gift that is within thee. (1Tim 4:14)
3. Stop fitting in and start standing out: There is only one you, so stop trying to be like everyone else and dare to beYOUtiful! Celebrate your strengths and shine your light. The things that you think make you weird or different are the very things that set you apart from everyone else and make you a one-of-a-kind miracle. There’s a divine purpose for your life that only you can fulfill.
4. You lack discipline! That classic line is shouted by Arnold in Kindergarten Cop, but I use it all the time in full-on Ahnuld accent, to remind myself and my clients that we alone are responsible for training our minds and not allowing our thoughts to run our lives. What you think about, you bring about — wanted or not. We must take every thought captive, meaning when thoughts go unexamined they can cause us harm because they are literally creating our future. One of my favorite scriptures that I keep on my desk is Philippians 4:8, Whatever is lovely, pure, noble, excellent and praiseworthy — think on those things. That’s what I want in my life.
5. You can reinvent yourself at any age: From body builder, to blockbuster film star, to the Governator of California, Arnold is a champion of reinvention. It’s never too late to become the person you were born to be. Thoreau once said, “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them” When I first read that quote, I thought to myself, that sure as hell ain’t gonna be me! Sing your song, dance your dance, do what makes your heart come alive. Change can be scary, but strength lies on the other side of risk. You get to have a do-over any damn time you want! Last year amidst a global pandemic and quarantine, I decided to start painting. To my surprise, I’ve sold six paintings and have reinvented myself into an artist.
6. Don’t put people on pedestals: Arnold fell hard off the pedestal I had put him on when I found out he had been shtupping his maid. I felt hurt, angry and even betrayed. I yelled a final, hasta la vista, baby, as I hit the unfollow button on all of his social media accounts. But I learned in 12-step recovery that what anyone else does is none of my business and that I am only responsible for keeping my side of the street clean. People are fallible and should not become our idols, but God often uses deeply flawed people as His instruments. So who am I to judge?
7. Take action: Write the letter, make the call, send the text. When I wrote that letter to Arnold, I had no idea that it would turn out to be the very thing that launched my entire speaking career. The first time I ever told this story was at a New England Speakers Association monthly meeting during their speaker showcase segment. From that five minute talk, I got selected to represent the New England chapter and speak at the annual convention for the National Speakers Association. The rest, as they say, is history. I’ve been a professional speaker for over thirty years and have had the privilege of inspiring parents, teachers and students all over the country.

Bonus Tip: Ask for Help! The word grace means, the unmerited strength and favor of God to handle every challenge. You don’t have to earn it — you just have to ask for it. A fall from grace then is simply falling away from God and forgetting to ask for His strength, while relying on our own self-will. Who hasn’t done that? I had to ask for forgiveness for having judged Arnold after his own fall from grace. I’m back to loving the guy, but now the only one I worship is God!

Until next week… I’ll be back!